By Rick Stanton
I played a lot of baseball growing up and, later, fast- and slo-pitch softball. Father Time has a way of adjusting your game to the ability allowed by your age.
At every stage, I always played the game like it was the last one I’d ever play. I got the nickname “Big Dog” for my aggressiveness and toughness. And sometimes I was an idiot, when the Big Dog persona took center stage. For example, I wasn’t exactly pleasant after a loss, to say the least. Sometimes the expectations that go along with being a guy, especially a jock, makes you stupid.
And when you’re stupid, you do stupid stuff. Like chewing tobacco (think Barrett’s esophagus, which I’m dealing with, and potential throat cancer), getting into bar fights and being thrown out of games for saying things to umpires that you wouldn’t say to anyone in any other situation.
I’m not proud of this, but when I played at Lower Columbia College, there was an umpire name Bill Cheatley. Bill and I knew each from the days he was a teacher at Monticello Junior High, where I was a student. Bill was a respected educator, but once he put on an umpire’s mask, he became a jerk. And, alas, he had a glass eye.
After ringing me up on a ball around my neck against Portland State, I made the mistake of saying, “Next time, use the other eye.” Cruel and stupid—and it cost my team its No. 5 hitter when I was banished to an early shower.
Ironically and fittingly for me, an ad ran during the recent ESPYS that underscored why I thank God that my mother taught me the other side of being a man. The ad is titled #EvolvetheDefinition and it comes from the clothing company Bonobos.
The ad emphasizes that, as guys, we need to believe in ourselves and who we are as individuals and not think being a guy means you’re a stereotypical stud by old, horse-crap standards. Kindness to others and the ability to not be ashamed when you feel like a good cry is in order were mom’s gifts to me—and the flip side of being a stupid guy.
It’s about being a humane human being. With apologies to both Bill Cheatley and my mom, I offer the link below. [Someone please forward it to Trump.]
https://www.thedrum.com/news/2018/07/18/ads-we-bonobos-redefines-what-it-means-be-masculine